I confess I cry at IEP meetings.  Pretty much every single one.

I find them to be very impersonal – about a very personal subject.  Grace

I know people are doing their jobs, and are bound by restrictions.  I know that in my head.  Another part of me wants to call them all out to stop saying that we are a team.  It’s not a team the way that I define the term.

I also know we have rights.  Those rights are confusing though.  Beyond that there is the constant weighing of what fight to fight.  You can’t fight them all – or I can’t anyway- if I was only fighting I’d never get to just enjoy being Grace’s mom.  Additionally we’d be fighting the very people we are depending on to help Grace learn.  That’s a really tough spot for everyone.

She’s their job.  She’s my daughter.

I’m so sad it has to be this way.

And on a related – but separate note – I hate when people describe Grace as complex.  It’s a word that does not resonate well with me.  It’s often the beginning phrase of an explanation “Grace is so complex……” that seems to include a lot of excuses.

I appreciate the word when’s its used respectfully.   This happens when the acknowledgement of her complexity is factored into a plan.  Only our epileptologist and pediatrician are really able to use the word without me getting all bristle-y.

Grace is Grace.  Let’s focus on her.  Her as a whole being.  Not how the various “parts” of her don’t really seem to fit.

Joy

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