Grace and I went to the grocery store yesterday. I did something I hadn’t done before – I didn’t take the stroller, and I didn’t put her in a cart-she walked! (Ok, I put her down after we got past the traffic in front of the store.) Anyhow, she was so fun to watch as she wandered about. She could look into the baskets of vegetables that were low enough. She felt the cold of the cooler. My favorite part was when we rounded the corner and approached the chip aisle… she let go of my hand in no uncertain terms and took off. You can imagine can’t you…. the chip aisle is brightly colored, with an unending number of bags that make great crinkling noises…Grace slowed down to take it all in. I worried a little bit about the people rushing by, but I found that most were incredibly patient with a little girl in a pink helmet wandering the chip aisle. I considered the whole outing a great success. I did tell Kevin later though that it would not be a good idea to let Grace walk if we were in a hurry.
Today I got home from work – completely overloaded. Wondering how I will ever actually complete all that is on my plate… my mind was absolutely racing. As I sat on the couch to talk with the nurse Grace walked over to me and held up her arm. This is my cue to pick her up. I did. She snuggled into my shoulder and I heard her breathing change- she went to sleep. So I sat there, mind racing, her little self curled up against my heart- and then that felt foolish. Why was I worried about work? I was having the most wonderful moment with Grace, and I almost missed it. So then I leaned into it. I held her a little tighter, kissed her on the forehead, and whispered to her how much I love her. I remembered the magic of the chip aisle. I hope she’ll be patient with me as she continues to teach me to slow down, to not worry as much, to recognize that there is only so much I can control- and that the chip aisle can be magical.