Kevin, Grace, and I are on our way to St.Paul- we’ll spend the weekend there and then meet with Dr. Doescher (Grace’s epileptologist) on Monday morning. We stopped for lunch at one of Kevin’s favorite sandwich shops from his time at Iowa State. It was crowded inside so we went outside to sit down. She was already out there– talking loudly- sounding young, and like a college student. Then all of a sudden she switched gears and began talking about med school. She thought “be nice to your patient class” was dumb, boring– she talked about her upcoming rotations and how easy they were going to be… not so much studying–it was so abstract. As she talked I was feeding Grace through the g-tube…Kevin ran in and out of the restaurant rinsing things out for me. Did she seriously not notice we were there?
Kevin, Grace, and I left – but I told Kevin I needed to go back. As nicely as I could I wished her luck on her rotations, told her that i hoped she would learn a lot, and that she would take “be nice to your patient class” seriously. I reminded her that she would be working with people and their families – that this work she’d be doing was personal… or that “personal” part is what I meant to say. She apologized for upsetting me… I asked her just to remember that she’s working with people. I was shaking inside– where was all this coming from?
Back at the car I rode quietly until at one point Kevin asked me “Are you ok?” I just couldn’t believe I had done that. I’d done it nicely….but normally I would have just shook my head and walked away- never daring to say something.
But because of Grace – there is a new standard. Someday that woman could be the doctor caring for my child–and why would I not take an opportunity to shape her? and is it really that or did she just tick me off? The more I’ve thought about it, I’ve come to this conclusion–she did tick me off – but no longer is it ok to just walk away without trying to positively affect the situation –I said something because I’m Grace’s mom.